My health and my spiritual studies compete for my time. I have had the message a few times now, via my tarot and runes, that I am out of balance and my connection won’t progress/deepen until my health is back in balance. Since working at my practice, mainly yoga every morning, I’ve been starting to hear things – get messages – like when I’m half asleep or daydreaming – or during yoga or even just during my daily activities. Regarding my heath I have a feeling like there is something I’m just not getting. If all physical ailments begin in the energy body, or energetically, then we should be able to heal ourselves on that level if we find where that blockage is. I’ve been working on this – as well as making changes in the physical plane, like diet and yoga – but I feel like I keep bumping up against an unknown thing – something that is blocking me, or something going on in my body that I am unaware of. I’m missing something.

I tried to go to a medical intuitive this week – but the guy stood me up! Twice! Since I’ve been asking for guidance towards the right person to help me, I have to take that as a sign this guy was not the one. But – it left me feeling quite disappointed and frustrated. I put a call into my naturopath when I was super ill and desperate, he didn’t get back to me for days. Turns out he was away. I feel like whenever I reach out for help with this, I get nothing back. There’s this sludgy feeling – this molasses. The spirits are not with me. I am left to flounder around in the dark by myself. And to get up and do anything about it feels like climbing a mountain. My motivation, my mind, my energy levels – all are effected by this disease. Finding the path to wellness feels impossible, much less walking it. And – am I to do it all on my own? Is this the lesson?

At any rate – I’m going to try to record these little messages when I get them. Try to make a habit of listening in and paying mind to them, instead of letting the thought float in and out of my consciousness. I’ve been asking for guidance – first thing is to learn to hear it.

So I might be posting odd little short posts here an there – just as part of the exercise of listening.