A journey.

My cousin has studied shamanistic practices with a teacher trained on the Incan path. She’s done a full year medicine wheel. Last year on my birthday she offered to facilitate a journey for me which I accepted. This was the beginning of a re-spark in my interest of things of this nature – my spirituality lay dormant up to that time. The journey was very powerful – not so much in what happened, which was interesting enough, but in that it totally wiped me out for the rest of the day. I had to sleep – a lot. It was super inspiring, and I wanted more. this is why I’ve been studying again.

Before we started she had me lie down on a bed:

Her treatment room is cozy – shades pulled – the afternoon is quiet and sunny. She asks me to pick a rock from a collection she has – just any one that I feel drawn to – this will help to ground me in this reality. She covers me with a blanket, asks me to close my eyes, and starts the drumming.

While drumming she calls in the four directions, with mentions of animals and terrain at each direction… mountains, panther, eagle, the sea.. she asks them to come and sit with us and to welcome me. Then she says she is opening some kind of doorway. She says we will be looking for a helper spirit for me – a guide, usually an animal. Then she starts the journey. She tells me where to go, and what I am seeing. Not specifics, but more a road-map.

She says, ‘you are in a land you know – somewhere you’ve been before, somewhere that is safe to you’, then, ‘you enter into a tunnel in the side of a hill’ and I go down the tunnel for a time. Then, ‘you come out of the tunnel and you are in a land that you do not know – that is new to you’. I come out in the middle of a desert! I am surprised by this because I don’t like deserts – never have been drawn to them at all. I try to change the scenery in my mind into a lush green west-coast rainforest. But as she directs me to walk up the path in this place I find it’s too much of a struggle to make the rainforest happen. It keeps fading at the corners. So finally I give up and it fades away completely into this desert. Golden sands. No plants. Nothing for miles and miles but the sand.

She says as I walk up the path my guide is walking behind me to my left. I can feel a presence. Then she says ‘you come over a hill to a large body of water’ which is weird because I am already at a large body of water. It’s a huge desert lake, filled with salt I think. It glistens and changes colors in the shallow parts. It’s beautiful actually.

She says, ‘now turn to meet your guide’. I turn and behind me there is a 7 foot tall human-looking shadow. A huge Being with no face. We don’t speak. I turn back and get a bird’s eye view of me standing at the edge of this lake with my guardian just behind me.

She pulls me out.

Afterwards I am exhausted and want to sleep all day. My over-all impression is that it was very powerful. I wished I could have spent more time in there. I wished that Being had a face. I felt like I was trying too hard in that state to make something happen, rather than just letting things happen.

When I tell me cousin that it wasn’t an animal, she is not surprised – she says she had a feeling earlier that day while preparing for this, that it wouldn’t be an animal we would meet.

So – is it a guardian angel? Some kind of guide? I don’t know. But I want to go back.


feature image ‘The Magic Circle’ by Waterhouse